My princess is 9,her next birthday is about 5 months away and she'll be the dreaded double digits. I really haven't been that worried about this age, not like I worry about the impending teen years.
But I've noticed some changes lately that have made me realize the teen years aren't that far off, and she doesn't need to be a teenager to have things start happening that are freaking me out a little.
A couple days ago as she was getting dressed I walked in her room to hurry her along, (she is so slow in the mornings I'm starting to think maybe getting her up and hour earlier is necessary)so I walk in and notice these 2 little points poking out of her shirt. Well hell really she's only 9, I grab a cami and tell her to put it on under her current shirt and sure enough there's 2 pointy little nips poking out. What? When did this happen? This is my baby girl right? When did all this growing up start? Where the hell do I find a sports bra in her size?
At least now I am starting to understand her mood swings and emotional outbursts a little better. But cripes I thought I had a few more years. So I talked to a friend of mine with 3 girls one of which is the princesses bff, and 2 that are older and she informed me that nope it can start this early and even more fun is in store within the next 2 years. Lovely.
We've already had the talk about what she can expect when she gets her period. We had this talk for many reasons one is because the girls in our family do tend to develop young but not quite this young. I just keep hoping that this is a really slow process. But if the last few months are any indication of what we can expect it so won't be as slow as I want it to be.
I can just imagine how much fun the next oh say 5 or 6 years are going to be around here. For now I'll be planning a shopping trip for some mini sized bras oh what fun.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
Choosing to let go
Some friendships last forever, some for a short period of time. Sometimes they're worth fighting for with everything you have, other times you have to make the decision to let it go and walk away.
I've recently been faced with one of these choices in this particular instance I'm going with the latter. I thought this person was a good friend I've been there for them through some serious amounts of bs in their life. But when someone decided to go all kinds of high school and bring my name into their family drama instead of talking to me like a true friend this persons first reaction was to turn on me and accuse me of things I didn't say or do. I chose not to fall into this crap, I told them I did nothing wrong,but if they wanted to throw our friendship away over this that was their choice, I wished them well and told them I was done, and that's exactly where I stand.
Since I made position clear this person has sent me several messages wanting answers at this point I refuse to respond any further. I understand they've had a rough life and have trust issues but I wont be dragged into these kind of dramatic high school games no matter who is behind them. I have more than enough going on in my own life to worry about my friends turning on me too.
It's sad and I'm sorry to say goodbye to someone I once considered a good friend but sometimes that's just the choice that has to be made. I have to do what's best for my own life and family. I wish this person the best in life and hope that they can find peace and happines in their family, unfortunately I just can't be apart of that lif any longer.
I've recently been faced with one of these choices in this particular instance I'm going with the latter. I thought this person was a good friend I've been there for them through some serious amounts of bs in their life. But when someone decided to go all kinds of high school and bring my name into their family drama instead of talking to me like a true friend this persons first reaction was to turn on me and accuse me of things I didn't say or do. I chose not to fall into this crap, I told them I did nothing wrong,but if they wanted to throw our friendship away over this that was their choice, I wished them well and told them I was done, and that's exactly where I stand.
Since I made position clear this person has sent me several messages wanting answers at this point I refuse to respond any further. I understand they've had a rough life and have trust issues but I wont be dragged into these kind of dramatic high school games no matter who is behind them. I have more than enough going on in my own life to worry about my friends turning on me too.
It's sad and I'm sorry to say goodbye to someone I once considered a good friend but sometimes that's just the choice that has to be made. I have to do what's best for my own life and family. I wish this person the best in life and hope that they can find peace and happines in their family, unfortunately I just can't be apart of that lif any longer.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
New name same great Becky
I'm sure a couple of you noticed there was a change of name on my blog. I figured I should give a quick explanation. I received a very cordial cease an desist order, in the form of an email stating that apparently my previous blog name is already in use and has been for some time. So being the nice person I am I changed my blog name and url.I didn't really have a choice the person who had already been using it has had it since 2006 and it really is only right. She was pretty nice about it too. So if you follow me please be sure to update in you feed etc.
In happier news I finally figured out how to blog from my nook and android so there will be more posts coming in the near future.
In happier news I finally figured out how to blog from my nook and android so there will be more posts coming in the near future.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Weekly ramblings
~The hubs worked on a buddies Mustang the other day and when he was finished he had to drop it off at work for the guy. I haven't driven a really nice Mustang like that since before the hubs sold his a few years ago so he let me drive it. The whole time it took everything I had to behave and drive like a responsible adult, especially with that damn voice in my head chanting "Drive it like you stole it, drive it like you stole it" over and over. I didn't but man did I want to. He's lucky we didn't have to take the freeway or I totally would have given in to the voice. I still keep dreaming about that damn car, now I feel the undeniable urge to steal it.
~After dropping off his buddies Mustang the hubs stopped to talk for a minute while I went to park, as I drove by I heard someone ask him if that was his daughter driving. I laughed a lot. Hubs is 32 in a couple weeks & I just turned 31. That's just funny. I asked him later about it, he said the guy thought I must be his daughter because he thought his wife was fat and ugly. Now I'm wondering what the hell the hubs says about me at work. It's driving me a little nutty wondering.
~The last few weeks at the new house have been spent on cleaning out anything that's garbage, needs to go to the garage sale, or does not belong to someone in my immediate family or my MIL or BIL., and peeling wall paper. Lots of wallpaper, some of it painted over. For the love of all that is holy if you have wallpaper you don't like and you decide you want to paint, scrape that crap off first. You or the future owners of the house will appreciate it in the future. Besides I'm pretty sure it's like bad house juju to paint over wallpaper, or at least it should be.
~The princess is so cute the hubs and I are getting new phones and I told her I was adding her pick up and go phone onto our contract because it was cheaper. She say's "well since your getting a new one you can just give me your old one, I don't want a junky old flip phone anymore" Right darling daughter because a 9 year old who only uses their phone for emergencies and to call mom for a ride or to say good night needs and Android 2, with a $50 a month data package. I think not lovely. Next thing I know the 4 y/o will be demanding a phone too. Sheesh.
~About those new phones I had to go to the Verizon store to get the hubs a new one since his well is useless, can't even shut his alarm off now the screen is so cracked and he's way over due for an upgrade anyway. So I go in expecting to have to deal with another airhead (the last 3 times I've been there the chicks I've dealt with have been 27 grams short of a pound) but yesterday I was pleasantly surprised by Ed he was spectacular. He understood what I was telling him about my account (that one of the previous airheads totally screwed up) the first time and was able to help me right away and he hooked me up with a free phone on top of the hubs new one so yay for once I didn't leave confused or angry by what just happened. He even let me know when he'd be in so I could bring the phones back in so he could transfer all our stuff over. Ed is my new bff at the Verizon store. I'm totally calling ahead from now on to make sure he's in.
~ I've learned that staring at things does not suddenly make what you want to happen. EX: staring into the freezer will not make the last ice cream cone reappear after someone and theived it, nor will staring at my humongous pile of dirty clothes or dishes make them wash themselves. I find this to be ridiculous. Also I want that damn magic wand I was promised in a dream.
~It occurred to me yesterday that there's only 4 more weeks left of summer vacation, this both saddened me and made me want to dance a jig. I'm sad because the sooner school starts the sooner the leaves will fall and the awful 4 letter word will come, I want to run around dancing like a crazy person because this mama needs a break from her kids. (I'm not the only on right)
~While most people I know are whining about the amazing amount of sweat inducing heat we've had this summer, I've for the most part reveled in it. I can not abide by the cold. In fact I take great issue with my parents producing me in such and arctic wasteland. I think I should become a snow bird now even though the hubs and I are no where near retirement age. Don't get me wrong I love the Mitten for about 4 months out of the year, sometimes 5.
~After dropping off his buddies Mustang the hubs stopped to talk for a minute while I went to park, as I drove by I heard someone ask him if that was his daughter driving. I laughed a lot. Hubs is 32 in a couple weeks & I just turned 31. That's just funny. I asked him later about it, he said the guy thought I must be his daughter because he thought his wife was fat and ugly. Now I'm wondering what the hell the hubs says about me at work. It's driving me a little nutty wondering.
~The last few weeks at the new house have been spent on cleaning out anything that's garbage, needs to go to the garage sale, or does not belong to someone in my immediate family or my MIL or BIL., and peeling wall paper. Lots of wallpaper, some of it painted over. For the love of all that is holy if you have wallpaper you don't like and you decide you want to paint, scrape that crap off first. You or the future owners of the house will appreciate it in the future. Besides I'm pretty sure it's like bad house juju to paint over wallpaper, or at least it should be.
~The princess is so cute the hubs and I are getting new phones and I told her I was adding her pick up and go phone onto our contract because it was cheaper. She say's "well since your getting a new one you can just give me your old one, I don't want a junky old flip phone anymore" Right darling daughter because a 9 year old who only uses their phone for emergencies and to call mom for a ride or to say good night needs and Android 2, with a $50 a month data package. I think not lovely. Next thing I know the 4 y/o will be demanding a phone too. Sheesh.
~About those new phones I had to go to the Verizon store to get the hubs a new one since his well is useless, can't even shut his alarm off now the screen is so cracked and he's way over due for an upgrade anyway. So I go in expecting to have to deal with another airhead (the last 3 times I've been there the chicks I've dealt with have been 27 grams short of a pound) but yesterday I was pleasantly surprised by Ed he was spectacular. He understood what I was telling him about my account (that one of the previous airheads totally screwed up) the first time and was able to help me right away and he hooked me up with a free phone on top of the hubs new one so yay for once I didn't leave confused or angry by what just happened. He even let me know when he'd be in so I could bring the phones back in so he could transfer all our stuff over. Ed is my new bff at the Verizon store. I'm totally calling ahead from now on to make sure he's in.
~ I've learned that staring at things does not suddenly make what you want to happen. EX: staring into the freezer will not make the last ice cream cone reappear after someone and theived it, nor will staring at my humongous pile of dirty clothes or dishes make them wash themselves. I find this to be ridiculous. Also I want that damn magic wand I was promised in a dream.
~It occurred to me yesterday that there's only 4 more weeks left of summer vacation, this both saddened me and made me want to dance a jig. I'm sad because the sooner school starts the sooner the leaves will fall and the awful 4 letter word will come, I want to run around dancing like a crazy person because this mama needs a break from her kids. (I'm not the only on right)
~While most people I know are whining about the amazing amount of sweat inducing heat we've had this summer, I've for the most part reveled in it. I can not abide by the cold. In fact I take great issue with my parents producing me in such and arctic wasteland. I think I should become a snow bird now even though the hubs and I are no where near retirement age. Don't get me wrong I love the Mitten for about 4 months out of the year, sometimes 5.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Downy Unstoppables
About a week or so ago I received a nifty little package in the mail that said blogger exclusive on it. Well now my curiosity was piqued. This was the first time I had received anything as a blogger so I have to admit I was pretty excited. So I rip into the packaging and it's a full size sample of Downy Unstopables from Vocalpoint which they would like me to try out and if I would like to share my opinion on my blog they wouldn't mind.
Ok I can handle this. I like free stuff, I definitely don't mind giving my opinion so here we go.
What it is:
Downy Unstopables in wash scent booster is a new laundry scent booster. The dissolving scent beads go in before you start the wash. (They say to do it before so more scent infuses into your laundry and that the scent lasts for up to 30 days, I haven't had it for that long so I can't prove it but I can guarantee it lasts at least 8)
How to use:
1) Gather a load of laundry
2) Shake a little or a lot of the Downy Unstopables into the cap
3) Pour directly into drum of washing machine
4) Add detergent
5) Add laundry
6) Enjoy the lasting fresh scent
I decided to start with a load of towells for 3 reasons. First it was the biggest load I had, second they were all damp and starting to smell kind of funky and third I'm notorious for forgetting them in the washer for at least a few extra hours and them starting to get that smell (you know the smell).
So I liberally filled the cap and poured it in and proceeded to fill the washer with my detergent and towells. After the cycle was finished and I went to pull the load of towells out the scent was a little over powering and I decided I had been a little to liberal with the scented beads. So on the next load I cut the amount from a full cap to a little under a half cap that was much better.
It's now been 8 days and the towells and sheets that were washed with the Downy Unstopables still smell as fresh and clean as they did fresh out of the dryer.
Disclaimer: I received no compensation from Downy for this review. Vocalpoint did send me the sample for trial and review purposes.
If you or anyone you know are interested in becoming a Vocalpoint member and getting the chance to sample exclusive products and give your opinions visit their website at www.vocalpoint.com
Ok I can handle this. I like free stuff, I definitely don't mind giving my opinion so here we go.
What it is:
Downy Unstopables in wash scent booster is a new laundry scent booster. The dissolving scent beads go in before you start the wash. (They say to do it before so more scent infuses into your laundry and that the scent lasts for up to 30 days, I haven't had it for that long so I can't prove it but I can guarantee it lasts at least 8)
How to use:
1) Gather a load of laundry
2) Shake a little or a lot of the Downy Unstopables into the cap
3) Pour directly into drum of washing machine
4) Add detergent
5) Add laundry
6) Enjoy the lasting fresh scent
I decided to start with a load of towells for 3 reasons. First it was the biggest load I had, second they were all damp and starting to smell kind of funky and third I'm notorious for forgetting them in the washer for at least a few extra hours and them starting to get that smell (you know the smell).
So I liberally filled the cap and poured it in and proceeded to fill the washer with my detergent and towells. After the cycle was finished and I went to pull the load of towells out the scent was a little over powering and I decided I had been a little to liberal with the scented beads. So on the next load I cut the amount from a full cap to a little under a half cap that was much better.
It's now been 8 days and the towells and sheets that were washed with the Downy Unstopables still smell as fresh and clean as they did fresh out of the dryer.
Disclaimer: I received no compensation from Downy for this review. Vocalpoint did send me the sample for trial and review purposes.
If you or anyone you know are interested in becoming a Vocalpoint member and getting the chance to sample exclusive products and give your opinions visit their website at www.vocalpoint.com
Thursday, June 30, 2011
I'm just floored
In my last post I talked about my personal experiences with the loss of my father and the more recent leaving of my father in law. Now my father in law leaving was rough on the family but all his children are grown, he didn't abandon any of us. He is just taking a different path now in what I guess you could call his twilight years.
But the night I posted that I talked to a pretty close friend and found out her husband is leaving her and her kids. Just totally walking out on his family. This floored me, hell it devastated me. This was a couple I thought would be together forever. I've only known them for about 6 years but in that time I've seen what I would call an extremely close family, and a couple that could survive damn near anything, and from the stories I've heard they had. But not this time.
I don't know all the details and even if I did it's not my story to tell but there's some old demons that have reared their heads again. Apparently this time he just can't or won't find the strength to exorcise them. So instead this man whom I always thought very highly of is walking away from his beautiful wife, his high school sweet heart, the mother of his 3 beautiful girls, the woman whose stood by his side through everything and not just her but their children. He's just giving up on all of them and leaving, not just the home but the state. I don't understand.
I'm trying not to judge him because I haven't spoken to him, nor have I walked in his shoes. But I'm having a hard time seeing anything that makes how he's handling this situation ok. The youngest daughter is the princesses very best friend in the whole world and like a third child of ours and I can't stand the idea of anything hurting this child, and she idolized her father.
My friend is one of the most amazing, strongest women I've ever met and I had to watch her fall apart while she told me what was going on. I don't blame her for falling apart, I wouldn't expect anything less, what upsets me is that someone so strong that has been through so much in her life should not have to go through this. She should not be worrying about how to get her girls through this, or thinking what she did wrong, or to deserve this. She's not perfect none of us are but damn it she deserves happiness and to have her family. She should be making plans for family camping trips, summer bbq's, our get togethers to the beach. Not stressing out about making sure her kids don't see her upset, or worrying about getting them into counseling to deal with the fall out.
The whole situation just really suck and I wish there was more I could do. But all I can do is be here when she needs a friend and keep telling her it's not her fault. All I can say is WTF, and hope and pray that they all make it through this ok and maybe just maybe he comes to his senses and realizes everything he's walking away from.
But the night I posted that I talked to a pretty close friend and found out her husband is leaving her and her kids. Just totally walking out on his family. This floored me, hell it devastated me. This was a couple I thought would be together forever. I've only known them for about 6 years but in that time I've seen what I would call an extremely close family, and a couple that could survive damn near anything, and from the stories I've heard they had. But not this time.
I don't know all the details and even if I did it's not my story to tell but there's some old demons that have reared their heads again. Apparently this time he just can't or won't find the strength to exorcise them. So instead this man whom I always thought very highly of is walking away from his beautiful wife, his high school sweet heart, the mother of his 3 beautiful girls, the woman whose stood by his side through everything and not just her but their children. He's just giving up on all of them and leaving, not just the home but the state. I don't understand.
I'm trying not to judge him because I haven't spoken to him, nor have I walked in his shoes. But I'm having a hard time seeing anything that makes how he's handling this situation ok. The youngest daughter is the princesses very best friend in the whole world and like a third child of ours and I can't stand the idea of anything hurting this child, and she idolized her father.
My friend is one of the most amazing, strongest women I've ever met and I had to watch her fall apart while she told me what was going on. I don't blame her for falling apart, I wouldn't expect anything less, what upsets me is that someone so strong that has been through so much in her life should not have to go through this. She should not be worrying about how to get her girls through this, or thinking what she did wrong, or to deserve this. She's not perfect none of us are but damn it she deserves happiness and to have her family. She should be making plans for family camping trips, summer bbq's, our get togethers to the beach. Not stressing out about making sure her kids don't see her upset, or worrying about getting them into counseling to deal with the fall out.
The whole situation just really suck and I wish there was more I could do. But all I can do is be here when she needs a friend and keep telling her it's not her fault. All I can say is WTF, and hope and pray that they all make it through this ok and maybe just maybe he comes to his senses and realizes everything he's walking away from.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
When fathers leave
I've been thinking about dads a lot lately. Yeah I know fathers day was over a week ago but this isn't really a fathers day post anyway. I'm talking about more when fathers leave your life for one reason or another. Be it their choice or lifes.
Ok yesterday would have been my dads 59th birthday. But my dad died 13 years ago this August, and his birthday, fathers day, the date of his death, really a big chunk of summer is really hard for me to get through with out thinking about him. Obsessing over things left unsaid. Wondering if he would be proud of the woman I became. Wishing he could have been here to see his grandbabies, would he have liked the hubs, would we be as close today as I think we would have. Regretting all the little moments he should have been here for from giving me away even though I had my amazing poppy to do that job I still wish my dad would have been here. Or for my sisters graduations, or for the births of my kids or to talk some sense into my sister when she started dating the ass jacket she's with (though I know she never would have felt the need to be with some loser like him in the first place but that's a different story altogether) there's just so many things in all our lives I know would be so different if my daddy were still here. A piece of all of us died when he left this earth and nothings ever been the same.
I think this year it's hitting me a little harder than most because of every thing going on with my father in law. Today he leaves for Romania and were not really sure were ever going to see him again. He basically gave hubs and I his house, has said he has no intentions of returning to our state at all if and when he comes back to the states and we only have a vague idea of where he will be in Romania. On top of all that the man is in his 70's and not in the best of health to begin with. It's kind of like were saying our final farewell. Only I didn't get to do that. I tried to go say good bye to him yesterday but he wasn't around like he was supposed to be. And today I won't be able to go with the hubs and kids to take them to the airport because I'm watching my girlfriends kids and I can't drag 3 extra munchkins with us.
I'll be the first to admit I'm not always my FIL's biggest fan but I still love the old guy. But most of all I know that his leaving and the possibility of never seeing him again is really hurting the hubs. He's not saying to much about it but he loves that old man and he's gonna miss him something awful. I just hope and pray for him and the kids sake that this isn't the final goodbye. That they get at least a little more time even if it's just a visit here and there. The not knowing where he is and how he's doing is the worst.
I know in my FIL's heart he feels were all going to be fine without him.So he's not needed any longer and for the most part he's right we can all take care of ourselves. But we still want our family around, we'd like to know he's ok and to see him from time to time. I guess for now we'll just have to wait and see what happens.
Update: I did manage to go for a few minutes and see my father in law before the hubs and kids took him and the wife to the airport. So I was able to say my goodbyes and was shocked to find myself choking up and ready to cry like a baby. I can't believe how heart breaking it was for me to realize I may never see the old man again. We may not have always seen eye to eye and agreed on everything but I really do love the old coot, he's family and such a huge part of my life for the past 13 years I don't know what were going to do without him around. I just hope and pray this isn't the last time we see him. The good news is this time we do have a phone number and address so we can at least stay in touch,
Ok yesterday would have been my dads 59th birthday. But my dad died 13 years ago this August, and his birthday, fathers day, the date of his death, really a big chunk of summer is really hard for me to get through with out thinking about him. Obsessing over things left unsaid. Wondering if he would be proud of the woman I became. Wishing he could have been here to see his grandbabies, would he have liked the hubs, would we be as close today as I think we would have. Regretting all the little moments he should have been here for from giving me away even though I had my amazing poppy to do that job I still wish my dad would have been here. Or for my sisters graduations, or for the births of my kids or to talk some sense into my sister when she started dating the ass jacket she's with (though I know she never would have felt the need to be with some loser like him in the first place but that's a different story altogether) there's just so many things in all our lives I know would be so different if my daddy were still here. A piece of all of us died when he left this earth and nothings ever been the same.
I think this year it's hitting me a little harder than most because of every thing going on with my father in law. Today he leaves for Romania and were not really sure were ever going to see him again. He basically gave hubs and I his house, has said he has no intentions of returning to our state at all if and when he comes back to the states and we only have a vague idea of where he will be in Romania. On top of all that the man is in his 70's and not in the best of health to begin with. It's kind of like were saying our final farewell. Only I didn't get to do that. I tried to go say good bye to him yesterday but he wasn't around like he was supposed to be. And today I won't be able to go with the hubs and kids to take them to the airport because I'm watching my girlfriends kids and I can't drag 3 extra munchkins with us.
I'll be the first to admit I'm not always my FIL's biggest fan but I still love the old guy. But most of all I know that his leaving and the possibility of never seeing him again is really hurting the hubs. He's not saying to much about it but he loves that old man and he's gonna miss him something awful. I just hope and pray for him and the kids sake that this isn't the final goodbye. That they get at least a little more time even if it's just a visit here and there. The not knowing where he is and how he's doing is the worst.
I know in my FIL's heart he feels were all going to be fine without him.So he's not needed any longer and for the most part he's right we can all take care of ourselves. But we still want our family around, we'd like to know he's ok and to see him from time to time. I guess for now we'll just have to wait and see what happens.
Update: I did manage to go for a few minutes and see my father in law before the hubs and kids took him and the wife to the airport. So I was able to say my goodbyes and was shocked to find myself choking up and ready to cry like a baby. I can't believe how heart breaking it was for me to realize I may never see the old man again. We may not have always seen eye to eye and agreed on everything but I really do love the old coot, he's family and such a huge part of my life for the past 13 years I don't know what were going to do without him around. I just hope and pray this isn't the last time we see him. The good news is this time we do have a phone number and address so we can at least stay in touch,
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)