I love Christmas or at least I usually do but something is just off with me this year. Money isn't exactly growing on trees and that is rather suckish since I really like to give gifts, but I had pretty much reconciled myself with the fact that really only my kids, the hubs and a small handful of people would be receiving this year. To be honest I was ok with this, a little less stress trying to find the perfect gift for everyone anyway.
Besides there's always the Christmas cookies to hand out. You know the ones that start being baked like 3 weeks in advance so there's enough for oh a small army. But somehow even that isn't going as planned, and every time I turn around I'm hearing how someone else I had no intentions of buying for is not only buying for my children but for myself and the hubs as well. So of course now I feel like totally obligated to get them something more than just cookies. Cookies which by the way I'm 4 days away from a ton of people coming over for Christmas eve dinner and I haven't baked a single one.
On top of all that every time I think I'm finally done going to the store to buy my kids and hubs or one of the 100 other people that somehow made it on to my gift list, I realize oh no there's still this and that that's been forgotten. Like the gift certificate for someone who was actually on the original to buy for list or the stocking stuffers for my husband. I'm so out of it I almost forgot to buy my own mother a present, thank the good lord for ship direct with priority shipping. I'm also pretty sure at this point my bank account is running on fumes and all my creative bill paying and shuffling is still not going to work out in the end.
My worst fear though is someone is going to walk away from my house feeling bad because I forgot to get them a gift, or what ever I did give them was rather suckish. So tomorrow I will make one last friggin trip out into the madness that is last minute holiday shopping hell and hope that I don't forget anything else, cause if I do oh fucking well it's just to bad. Here's a bucket of cookies (hopefully I've come up with the energy to bake the damn things) eat a couple and be merry! Ho Ho fucking Ho!