The end of an era~kinda

I can't believe it. Today is the last day of preschool for my son. It seems like just yesterday I was dropping him off and crying because he was totally ok with me leaving him, and now it's all over. It's like the end of an era or something.

This year has just flown by so fast, and been so amazing to watch him  learn and grow as a little person. When he started he couldn't read or write, his social skills were well lets say they left a little something to be desired. But now he can read many a sight word, he can write his name as well as the alphabet and most of those same sight words that he can read. He knows his abc's and 123's, he is so much more social and less shy when it comes to making new friends. He went from being utterly terrified of school to loving it and wanting to go even on the weekends and over vacations. I think more than anything or anyone else I have his
teacher to thank , she is an amazing woman who I never had a qualm about leaving my child with. She's now taught both my children and they are both better for it. She's a very special woman, one of those rare teachers these days that you know is in the profession 100% for the kids and the love of teaching not just because she needs a job. Unfortunately the economy has been hard for our district like so many others and our preschool is being effected yet again, and though she'll have a job in the fall she doesn't know where at the moment but where ever it may be I hope the parents that get her next year realize how lucky they are to have such a caring, wonderful teacher for their kids. I wish her the best and will miss seeing her at our school, but I know there are still many generations left that will benefit from her.

As for my baby boy he'll head off to kindergarten next fall fully prepared because he had someone as wonderful as her guiding him this year. I have no doubt he'll be ok, because she would never let him go if he wasn't ready. Now if I can let him go is a whole nother issue. 

When did I start hating the phone

In my younger days like many a teen girl I pretty much had a phone glued  to my ear. Now my teen years are way back in the dawn of time you know right before everyone had a cell phone and texting was the norm, before any of us really knew what the internet was, let alone how to email or IM. The most advanced gadget we had was a pager which was just a way for someone to get you to call them when you weren't at home.

So the phone was my go to communication device for obvious reasons. When I turned 18 I got my first cell phone, nothing fancy still just a way to make and receive calls. Which was fine, I was a talker and that was all I needed. After a couple years I upgraded to push to talk cell ( the walkie talkie like Nextel/Sprint phones) still these phones were all about talking. It wasn't until I was in my mid 20's I got my first phone that took pictures and could text message. Now I adored these new features but I was still a talker. I've since upgraded a few more times and now have the do it all Droid 2 with more features than I even know how to use.

Somewhere along the way I stopped being a talker. Now and then I like to have an actual conversation, but for the most part I would rather text, email or FB than pick up the phone and talk. It has nothing to do with the people on the other end of the line, I don't love them any less, I just don't feel like talking. Now weather this change has more to do with me aging and changing or the changes in technology making it so much easier to be less personal I don't know.

Recently I've come to pretty much despise the phone for it's intended purpose. I'm happy to use it to text, email, post an update or a tweet,or play a game of angry birds, just don't ask me to make a phone call. I forget to call people back even the ones I really intended to call, if you have a cell and especially the same service provider I will text instead of calling . When it rings I get all annoyed without having a clue who it may be, just the ringing annoys me, and it's not the ringtone I've tried changing it, it doesn't help. I don't know exactly when my feelings about talking on the phone changed or why, but I actually kind of hope I get over it. I'm starting to feel like an asshole, shut in, whose not going to have any friends left because I can't be bothered to pick up the phone and return a call, or answer when they call me.

Veggie garden time

I love spring for so many reasons. The weather is starting to warm up, Yay! No more snow, another Big Yay. Grass is starting to grow, leaves start coming back, my flower beds start filling out again. My flower beds are a huge thing for me since I finally got them just about where I want them a couple years back and very little tweaking needs to be done to them each spring. Just the basic clean up and weeding and I can sit back and just watch all the hard work I put into them come back again and again. I love that.

But one of my favorite parts of spring is planting my garden (my vegetable garden). Every year I try and every year something goes wrong. Something will grow but only one year did everything I put in the ground actually grow and yield fruit or veggies. But this year I have a feeling things are going to be different. I haven't done anything massively different, it's just a feeling.

I started most of my seeds indoors in greenhouse flats, this is nothing new I've tried this before and failed miserably. But this year I waited until the middle of April and things began sprouting almost over night. I now have over half of 2 flats filled with starter plants that will be ready to go into the ground by next week as long as all chances of frost are gone. That shouldn't be a problem, but this is Michigan and it's not unheard of to get frost in the last week of April but I think by next weekend we should be safe.

I'm super excited about having fresh veggies all summer from my own garden. Last summer we had tomatoes,cucumbers, and peppers and just having those 3 things fresh on a regular basis was amazing. Not to mention money saving since we eat a lot of salads around here. I also love teaching my kids about providing for themselves, as well as others since any excess we have that we won't be able to use or can in time we will donate to local shelters or food banks. The kids will help with everything from planting, to weeding, harvesting, and if all goes well canning and preserving for winter. They will also go with me to donate any extras.

Until then I will be dreaming of all the fresh yumminess  that will hopefully be coming from my own backyard in the next few months. How about you, do any of you have plans for backyard gardens? If so what will you be planting?

Going to the North

This past weekend the hubs and I decided to take the  munchkins and all our toys up north. For those of you unfamiliar with Michigan lingo that is any where north of the thumb area where we reside. In our case it was about 5 hours 200 and some odd miles. When we told the kids we were going up north my son (the 4 y/o) immediately started saying we were going to the north, like were from the Confederacy and were heading into Yankee territory.

So we pack up the kids and the 4 wheeler, and dirt bikes, and go~kart, and hit the road in the wee hours of the morning. It was fairly nice weather in our area and all the snows been melted for at least 2 weeks. We get to our friend T's land at around 9:30 a.m and it's a little chilly but not bad definitely not bad enough to explain the large patches of un~melted  snow everywhere and still frozen ponds. We unloaded set up and gassed up all the the machines.

We  explored a few trails that didn't work out so well due to the snow,and we all look forward to getting back up there and seeing them when they're clear. But we did find some really great riding after awhile. The day warmed up and we found a pretty perfect clean path that the Princess was able to ride like a pro I swear I think she is better than me on a 4 wheeler, Apparently the go~kart is a pretty smooth ride or the boy was just that tired cause he actually nodded off at the end of the day in the passenger seat (wish I had a picture). For once the hubs actually got to let off some steam since I was there to watch the princess while he road his dirt bike.

A  couple really good old friends of ours were with us too, our friend T whose place it is we stay at and his cousin will just call him K. Anyway the princess had a grand time chasing them down on their 4 wheelers and trying to race them. She cracks me up sometimes last weekend she was at a pom competition, this weekend she was riding around on a 4 wheeler chasing down grown men and getting all muddy and loving every minute of it. Not to be out done the boy would backseat drive from the passenger seat of the go~kart and demand I catch the princess as she was not to win. 

We only got 1 day because the next morning we woke up and it was cold and raining like crazy. Everything was just a huge mud puddle mess. Which would have been all kinds of fun if a) it wasn't cold and b) we had more clothes but we had already gone through everything. But our buddy goes up every couple weeks, so we can go back up just about anytime and stay longer. Now it's just a matter of figuring out when our schedules mesh.

Oh well I'm not complaining even that 1 day away with the family to just go hang out and have fun doing something we all love together that really is just priceless.

Another Saturday another Pom competition

The princess and her pom team had Tri~States yesterday. It's like the 4th competition  shes's done in as many months. But for the first time I think she really enjoyed herself. She loves pom and she loves performing, but the being there all day is kind of boring for her.

Usually we all go as a family to her competitions, but this weekend the hubs had to work, and this one was a 2 hour drive one way on top of being an all day thing so I got my little sister to babysit the boy for me, because otherwise I would have spent the whole time running up and down bleachers telling him no and pulling my hair out. So it was just me and the princess. Which was kind of nice we don't get a lot of time just me and her.

On the drive there we talked about what she didn't like about comp. and mostly it's just how long it is and that she gets bored. I asked her if she ever watched the show or if she just hung out with her friend.She said no she never really got to watch , because her one friend didn't want to, and she was still getting to know the other girls because this is her first year on the team, and most of them have been together for 2 or more years. So I suggested that when she wasn't practicing with her own team she actually try to watch the other teams performances and if her one friend didn't want to watch then she could come sit with me or try hanging out with some of the other girls who were sitting down to watch.  When we got there the baton teams were still going on, and her team mates were all loosely gathered so we found seats in that general vicinity got her stuff together and off she went to visit. But every once in awhile she would come find me and sit down for a few to take in the other teams.

When it came time her team went out there and totally rocked. They performed twice once for open and once for championships. They placed 1st for open and 2nd for Championship. Yay!!!

On the way home she was exhausted but in a better mood than she normally is after a comp. I asked her if this one was better for her than the ones before and she agreed that yes it was. She had more fun, she actually liked watching the other teams, even the ones she was hoping her team would crush, she was starting to make more friends and that made a world of difference as well. She also really liked that it was just me and her and no little bother running around annoying her all day. Can't blame her there he can be a pain in the rear.

So all in all even though it was a long, exhausting day she was pretty happy about it all in the end. Now we have a break until the next one in May.

I'll love them even if they're gay

I read a blog this morning that got me thinking about what I would do if one of my children came home and told me they were gay.It's something I've thought about before, and even discussed a little bit with the hubs.

But after reading some of the stories in the news about a certain not so nice church group whose name I won't mention because that's what they want and reading this lovely blog it got me thinking some more.

How would I really respond if my beloved son walked in the door and said "Mom this is Mark, he's my boyfriend and I love him". I think I would have no problem embracing my son, telling him how much I love him and letting him know that he is who he is and no matter who he loves, none of that will change how I feel about him. Same goes for my daughter. She's a little older and already talking about boys so I don't really think there's much chance of her bringing a girlfriend home, while my son is only 4 and still thinks girls are icky and not anywhere near the stage where dating is on his radar. But you never know it's still awfully early in the game for both of them, and at this point they don't know who they are so I'm sure as hell not going to try and figure out what their sexuality may be in the distant future.

I can't say I don't have hope that they'll both be straight, and go on to live what most of us consider normal lives. But not because I see anything wrong with being gay or even because I think the lives of homosexuals are abnormal. But because I know how hard it can be for them. I want nothing but the best for my kids, I want them to lead long, happy successful and productive lives. If in the end they lead those lives as homosexuals that really is fine with me, and I will do everything in my power to make sure those lives are just as long, happy and productive as if they were straight. Because at the end of the day their sexuality wasn't a choice they made, it's who they are just as much as their Italian/Romanian/Irish heritage. I'll never stand by and let someone put my children down or make them feel less than for being who they are. Be it over the color of their skin, their culture, or sexuality.

If the day comes that one of these beautiful vibrant souls, that I gave life to comes to me and says I'm gay I will embrace them just like any other day and love them just the same. My only hope is that they find someone worthy of them regardless of their sex, race, or religion.

For Paige

 This blog is copied from Tiffany at mom-nom.com  it was a story I just had to share. 

 

For Paige…

by Tiffany

I’m terrified I won’t do this family the justice they deserve.  However, I also feel I will be doing them a disservice if I don’t tell you all about a little girl named Paige Ryan…and how you can help the world remember her.
Over the last year many of our online friends have had babies.  Several had them premature – including a girl I love dearly,  Jenny from What’s the Blog? – I’m sure you know her and her adorable triplets by now.  Many of our lives have been touched by the miracles that occur in NICU’s all across the country, everyday and the amazing research that the March of Dimes and other organizations do that help save lives…
Paige and Patrick were  born at 23 weeks old on February 9.  Many of you know, just from hearing those words, that the severity of this birth was rather high.  To make matters even more complicated, their daddy was in Fort Bliss, preparing to deploy to Iraq for his second tour…looking forward to coming home in May for the twins’ arrival.
At birth, Patrick weighed in at 1 pound, 7 ounces and Paige weighed 1 pound, 5 ounces – and they were beautiful - just like their parents.  As you can imagine, their first few nights were rocky, unstable at best.  Fortunately the Army had given Shannon a little over a week for emergency leave – so Amanda had him by her side  – and together they were finally a family of four.
Unfortunately, after a week of fighting for her life, Paige Ryan passed away at Nationwide Children’s Hosital.
Her daddy and mommy were by her side.  Her brother nearby.  And, as you can imagine, they are devastated.  
Patrick is still fighting – currently they are trying to figure out his stoma/bowel issues and hoping to regulate his blood pressure.  While Amanda stays in a Ronald McDonald home at the hospital, their daddy is on his way to Iraq.  Everyday Amanda updates all of us on her CaringBridge site.  She shares her highs and lows and allows us to share them with her.
And everyday I read her words and can’t imagine what she is going through.
So there you have it, friends.  A mother, like us, has just lost her daughter.  She has a son fighting for his life.  And her husband is in Iraq, serving his country.
Can you take a moment, for me, and wrap your brain around that?
And what are they asking people for?  What is the one thing that is on their mind constantly? 
How do they help the world remember Paige Ryan? 
How can they ensure their daughter is not forgotten?  That her legacy lives on?
And, in the midst of their sorrow and sadness, they have started the Paige Ryan Project.
Directly from Amanda & Shannon -

During the past month and a half, we’ve quickly realized there’s not much about this whole situation we can control. It literally has been a rollercoaster ride, full of short-lived highs and the lowest of lows, and will continue to be for many more months to come. We’re experiencing things so incredibly heartbreaking – the loss of our daughter and watching our son struggle with daily obstacles – that sometimes it’s difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But we continue to be hopeful and focused on the things we can control – how we respond/overcome, how we choose to remember our little girl and how we can help other families.
For those who know us well, you know we’re not ones to sit back and wallow in our hardships. Fairly soon after we lost Paige, we discussed what we could do to help others. We weren’t sure exactly what we wanted to do, but we agreed our little girl deserved a legacy. Her life, though short, had a purpose and as her parents, we want to make sure it is carried out.
We were surprised at how many husbands and wives are in similar situations as ours. One of them may not be deployed to Iraq, but many are separated just the same. There’s a couple in our unit from the UK who had their baby while on holiday here in Columbus. The mom is still here with their baby while the dad is having to remote parent from England. There’s another couple from North Dakota – the dad had to go back home for work and the mom is now here alone. So as you can see, we’re not the only ones relying on technology to communicate during a time when spouses need each other most. Unfortunately, many families in the NICU cannot afford laptops, ipads and/or webcams. So an experience that is already hard enough is made harder because of the limited tools available to communicate with loved ones, especially those who are far away.
With this in mind, we’ve decided to start a fund within Nationwide Children’s Hospital. The Paige Ryan Project will support the hospital’s technology efforts, specifically by purchasing ipads for the NICU in Paige’s memory. Families will be able to borrow an ipad when they are in the unit visiting with their baby. This will enable them to skype with family members, update their CaringBridge sites, research important medical information about their child, etc. right from the bedside. It really will be an invaluable resource for so many.
If you’d like to show your support by making a donation, please make checks payable to Nationwide Children’s Hospital and mail it to Cathy Kellerman at the address below. You can also call in credit card donations to Cathy as well. Please reference Paige Bibbee on all donations. All donations are tax deductible.
Cathy Kellerman, Foundation Director, Donor Relations
Nationwide Children’s Hospital
700 Children’s Drive
Columbus, OH 43205
Cathy.Kellerman@NationwideChildrens.org
614.355.0817
Shannon and I may never be the same after all of this, but we’re hoping to somehow emerge a stronger couple, more appreciative parents and even more compassionate people. With your support, and with the help of our own special guardian angel, we know it’s possible.
Thank you all for everything,
Shannon & Amanda

My challenge to you is this:
Donate $5.
Skip your lunch today.
Don’t buy your Starbucks.
And, donate.
Give this family the joy they so desperately deserve.  Help them build the legacy for their daughter – a daughter they never got the chance to fully know.   I know you are all generous people.  I know you understand the depths of this.
I know you know what this would do for their grieving souls.
And, even if you can’t donate, I would really appreciate it if you would help me spread this message.  Either by Tweeting my post, copying and pasting my post onto your own blog or emailing it to your friends.  This is the greatest gift I can give them right now. 
I owe them this.
For Paige